Beatrice.

You ahvays give to criminals and lunatics in dis Avorld every indulgence compatible with dere safe custody ; at least you ought to do . But ' revenons a nos moutons . ' Dese tivo silly people have now to face one another for life , mark dat , gentlemen . For life—all dis life . Dere is no'locus pcenitentia ' for them ; no ' animus revertendi ; ' dere domicile is fixed in cle great street of matrimony , and dere they must stay whether they will or noivhether they

, like it or not . All of a sudden dese two congenial companions and sympathetic souls find , dat dej' agree in noting . De man likes his club and Newmarket , de Avife likes dress ancl dancing . Dey have nothing to bind or cement them together ; dey go their own Avays , ancl before A'ery long , clere friends are again bored Avith their quarrels and their complaints , as they used to be with their spooning ancl their tomfooleries . Ahmy friendsthink Avell before you marry

, , , whom you marry , and how you marry . If you can find a true and honest girl who really cares for you , it is well , you Avill be a happy man ; but if you marry for caprice , or pique , or money , or rank , or ' couvenance , ' you will be unhappy , belieA'e me . A good marriage , a fitting marriage , is a A'ery blessed thing before God and man , but a foolish marriage , a heartless marriage , a senseless marriage , is—is—de very devil . "

There was a deep silence ivheu Brummer ceased from his pathetic oration , broken only by Twamley , ivho said , " Before this lodge adjourns and this child skedaddles , let me tell you a story , ladies and gentlemen , illustrative of the depth of woman ' s love , and woman ' s something else . " There ivas a profound silence "Onceupon atinie , " said Tivamley , "there was a gentleman full Avell-todo in this Avorld ' s goods , who gave out that he would only marry a thoroughly

good-tempered woman . Many gentle beings were much admired , but found wanting in this absolutely needful characteristic of a suitable helpmate . One young lady , of great good looks , intimated , however , to her friends , that she would 'fix' the recalcitrant hero ; and this is IIOAV she did it . One evening at a ball she asked him to take her clown to supper , and he , nothing loth , joyously complied . As they were sitting side by side , she turned the conversation on good temper . ' Oh ! ' she said ( though she was very bad tempered herself

, you ought to know ) , 'I think nothing of a woman who can't keep her temper . Good temper in a woman is absolutely a duty . ' Taking up a dish of strawberry cream , she asked her ' young man' to have some , and by some means ( still unknown or unexplained ) contrived to spill a portion of it over her new gown . ' Ah , ' she said , IIOAV . stupid of that clumsy Ai'aiter ; but it is not worth a thought . ' So impressed was the gentleman with her angelic disposition ,

that he proposed the next clay and was accepted . Of course , they got married , and a feiv months after matrimony the fact ivas too patent to the poor husband that he had actually married the ' worst tempered woman in the world . ' So struck was he with the fact and the change that had come OA'er the ' spirit of his dream , ' that in one of their daily skirmishes he taxed her with the alteration in her temperand contrasted Avhat she now hourlii'as with

, y what she once appeared to be , an ' angel of light . ' ' Oh , ' said she , ' I simply did you . I put on that sweet amiability . I made you marry me . And as you have taken me for better or for worse , you will have to see me as I reall y am . I ahA'ays meant to punish you for your impertinence to my sex , aud I Avill . ' Pleasant look out , was -it not , " said Twamley , " for that confiding husband ? "

"Ah , " said Brummer " dat is vat I ' ve always said ; de lvomaus is A'ery cunning . " "Well , " remarked Mr . Miller , for the first time , " a woman , you see , is a woman , and neA'er thi-OAvs aAvay a chance . " " Rather , " chimes in Twamley , " what I think we shall all agree on is , ' that Avomen are queer critters , ' and that all the world over the woman is the same , actuall y the same , whether on the Boulevarts or among the Andes , Avhether in London or Vienna , Constantinople or New York ; she is still the same . Yes ,