Trying To Change A Sovereign.

Chamber , and after they had made the usual obeisances , they looked up and beheld Majesty squatted on a three-legged stool in an attitude which is now known as the Anglo-Saxon . The great throne , swathed in canvas , stood unused behind the monarch ; Majesty ' s paduasoy doublet was threadbare and greasy ; one of Majesty ' s stockings displayed a very palpable hole , the other bore unmistakeable indications of having been recentldarned . Majest

y y fidgetted about on his seat , and twiddled nervously with the tags or points of the ribbons that attached his doublet to his hose ; Majesty ' s beard , which was cut spade-wise , was—from reasons not desirable to enter into , but which appeared to be not wholly unconnected with Majesty ' s tongue being somewhat too large for Majest y ' s mouth—not agreeable to contemplate . His Grace , * being thoroughly at his easewas pleased to be condescending . After

address-, ing his visitors in a long Latin oration , based upon the theories of some longsince-forgotten Roman author , the Sovereign deigned to crack a joke—I am afraid not worth reproduction— " The whilk he had heard , ye ken , frae the varra moothe o' the worthy Mess Muickleiohn , o' th' auld keeirk at Pe—e—e—e—bles ,

an' ye'll a' ken Mess Muicklejohn , kimmers , an' the guid story anent the meenester and the baker ' s wife an '— " but here Majesty was seized with such a fit of laughter at some undisclosed reminiscence—hilarit y in which his courtiers dutifully but syeophantically joined—that the business of the audience was necessarily suspended until the Sovereign of Great Britain and France and Lord of Ireland had recovered his breath and re-adjusted his points , some

of which had burst or become unfastened during a paroxysm of mirth scarcely compatible with regal dignity . When gravity returned Majesty submitted the epistle to the inspection of the artists , "the whilk , " as he was graciously pleased to obseve , " it maun e ' en be premeesed that we need nae weezards nor warlocks—Gude defeend ns—nor ony sic cattle—in skeermeellageography or siccan leeke to dee-cee-pher . The pouwer that rules th' airts o' a '

aye Chreestian Keengs an' Preences an' Governors havin ' , thanks be , endooed us wi' a perspeeiacitee—or as they ha't amang the Southrons—a perspeecuitee to peneetraite a' sic vaneetees . " I believe the opinions of these eminent experts may be found in the State Paper Office . I can give some notion of them by a quotation from an old ballad :

" Now , old King Cole on his cheek had a mole ; So he sent for his Secretaire , And he bade him to look in his fortune-telling book , And to read him his destinee !" " So this conjuror did look in his fortune-telling book , ' And , with a wise sigh , quoth he : ' A mole on the face says that something will take place ,

But not what that something will be ! ' " Messrs . Netherclift and Chabot were , I must admit , treated rather shabbily . They were not escorted to the buttery batch and asked "What they'd take ? " and I don ' t believe they either of them received a single penny by way of fees or conductmoney . Angus M'Auslane , of " Abairdeene , " who had the honour of undressing His Majesty that evening , has , indeed , informed me , and I see no

reason to doubt the truth of his statement , that his royal master , in getting into bed , was graciously pleased to observe that though " Corbies deed na ' peek out corbies een he had weel peek-it their feulish hairns an' aye savit his bawbees . " The next day being Monday , the day before the proposed opening of Parliament , Majesty rehearsed the speech from the throne in this wise , holding the while the postcard in his hand : —